Andre given a Teutonic Tonic - who will stop the German Juggernaut?
Schnuckelchen Knuddelbär of the
Teuton Daily Mirror reported today that a bunch of English louts from the bowels of England's nether regions were repulsed by a band of valiant
Teutonic Toilettenreinigers. (Or, should that read they were repulsed by the English louts nether regions)
Either way, the English had clearly found themselves in a pickle (and not the tasty kind) after visiting the local
Bierhalle. Having forgotten to reconnoiter the surrounding countryside, they found themselves hemmed in to the far left of the field with the entire Teutonic command bearing down on them. With little room to fire and evade due to a large plateaued central hill topped with a swaths of rough thorny German bramble, and patches of rough to their front, the English managed as best they could. The heavy concentration of light foot, medium arquebusiers and bowmen repulsed those Reivers (or should I say beerhall revelers) daring to venture over the hill. While several units did manage to venture out to the flanks and around the German juggernaut, it was too little, too late. The resulting loss of 52% to 25% could have been much worse. This high toll inflicted on the Teutons was mainly due to Andre's experienced generalmanship in leading several sneaky and successive flank attacks on exposed Teutonic supporting troops.Yet, this reporter can but commiserate with Andre's futile position. The terrain combined with such a relentless and determined attack by the enemy would have but one inevitable outcome.
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