Ode to Panzer Corps (with apologies to Monty Python)
Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2022 1:42 pm
Herewith, in celebration of all the nasty stuff the AI is infamous for, a musical tribute to Panzer Corps.
(to the tune of Always Look on the Bright Side of Life)
Everybody’s always out of ammo,
Everybody’s always short on fuel.
When the weather’s bad,
and the AI’s feeling sad,
count on getting massacred, out of the blue
So, always look on the AI’s side of the war.
Always remember, you’re who the bullets are for.
You think you’re gonna win,
but you’ll take it on the chin.
And don’t bother trying to even the score.
The AI seems to have a lot of magic,
that’s why your results are usually tragic.
When you fight in mud,
you pay for it in blood,
and you won’t even be able to fn move.
So, always look on the AI’s side of the battle…
Cannon fodder is a lot like human cattle.
Rudel is a dear,
and Dir is a bear,
but you can’t bloody win with just these two.
The next time you decide to play this game,
be sure to shoot for glory and fame
You’ll still get totally slaughtered,
right down to your sons and daughters,
but at least your life will never be the same.
So, always look on the AI’s side of things.
You’ll be bleeding up until the fat lady sings.
You think you’ll score some swag,
but you’ll get it in the bag.
Just forget about grabbing those golden rings.
(to the tune of Always Look on the Bright Side of Life)
Everybody’s always out of ammo,
Everybody’s always short on fuel.
When the weather’s bad,
and the AI’s feeling sad,
count on getting massacred, out of the blue
So, always look on the AI’s side of the war.
Always remember, you’re who the bullets are for.
You think you’re gonna win,
but you’ll take it on the chin.
And don’t bother trying to even the score.
The AI seems to have a lot of magic,
that’s why your results are usually tragic.
When you fight in mud,
you pay for it in blood,
and you won’t even be able to fn move.
So, always look on the AI’s side of the battle…
Cannon fodder is a lot like human cattle.
Rudel is a dear,
and Dir is a bear,
but you can’t bloody win with just these two.
The next time you decide to play this game,
be sure to shoot for glory and fame
You’ll still get totally slaughtered,
right down to your sons and daughters,
but at least your life will never be the same.
So, always look on the AI’s side of things.
You’ll be bleeding up until the fat lady sings.
You think you’ll score some swag,
but you’ll get it in the bag.
Just forget about grabbing those golden rings.
